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Discussion Starter #1
How to Make a Christmas Cake

Ingredients:
* 2 cups flour
* 1 stick butter
* 1 cup of water
* 1 tsp baking soda
* 1 cup of sugar
* 1 tsp salt
* 1 cup of brown sugar
* Lemon juice
* 4 large eggs
* Nuts
* 2 bottle wine
* 2 cups of dried fruit
Sample the wine to check quality. Take a largebowl, check the wine again.
To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour onelevel cup and drink.
Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cupof butter in a large
fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beatagain. At this point it's best
to make sure the wine is still OK. Try anothercup... Just in case. Turn
off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eggs and add tothe bowl and chuck in the
cup of dried fruit.
Pick the stupid fruit up off floor. Mix on theturner. If the fried druit
gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose witha drewscriver. Sample
the wine to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift twocups of salt. Or
something.. Check the wine. Now shift the lemonjuice and strain your nuts.
Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or some fink.Whatever you can find.
Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees andtry not to fall over.
Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally,throw the bowl through the
window. Finish the wine and wipe counter with thecat.
Go to Marks or Sainsburys and buy cake.
Bingle Jells!
 

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lmao i love this have sent it to my mum she makes the worst xmas cake for us every year hopefully she will take the hint lol
 
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